“When you come home from traveling for a long period of time, it’s hard to put it all into perspective, it’s hard to describe to people what you saw, how you felt you know, what you experienced. That’s something you won’t ever be able to properly explain. There’s a feeling, being on the road in a foreign place, that charges you with so much…life and energy. It’s such a rich experience to have. I completely forgot just how good it is to be on the road again, to see history and culture and experience it all at once. No matter where you go, you’re re-living history. You can’t recreate that whole world feeling somewhere else.” -Scott Wilson.
I started a blog post a while ago actually, but never expanded on it. It never felt complete nor did I feel like it had a purpose yet. But then I heard this when I was watching one of my latest obsessions – a travel series shot documentary style. When he said this I hung on to every word as if I was experiencing some sort of deja-vu…it was as if I had spoken those words before. Probably because I just experienced the same sensation recently. I am now on the other side of it, but I hope to not inhabit this area long.
Let’s rewind a month ago back to July 30th when I wrote this section of my blog and how I was feeling at the time:
They tell you about the rollercoaster you will go on, and emphasize culture shock once settling in a new country. But they only briefly touch on the reverse culture shock you will face. And I think that is an important thing to elaborate on and confront. I am facing it now.
I was blessed to acclimate to my new surrounding with ease – it felt like it was exactly where I needed to be.
But take that new and improved girl and place her back where she grew up, and all of sudden things don’t seem as normal or comfortable anymore.
I lived the first half of 2015 with every day being an adventure, every day being a challenge. I would be on trains and wake up in a new city on the weekends. During the week I’d walk to a university that was so foreign to me and I liked the way that pushed me. I was growing exponentially. Something I had hoped for in my admissions essay.
You take that person and all of sudden you feel like you are living in a fish tank.
*Disclaimer I am in no way saying anything about being back with my parents because I love every minute of bonding with them. I appreciate everything they have done for me. I am talking about me as a person being back in a state I always felt out of touch with. (They feel it too)
I feel confined.
Let’s fast forward to now. August 28th. 2015. I’ve just finished my first week back at UCF and it is my Senior year. To say things have been hectic would be an understatement, but being busy is always something I thrive on.
However, I did not expect the weird sensation I have being back here…I can’t put my finger on it. Like Scott said with traveling, this feeling is also something you will never be able to properly explain.
I guess the best way to sum it up is readjustment. There is no question I have grown from being put into a place I’ve never been before. The new and improved me is taking a step backwards and finding herself in an odd situation.
I told myself I would never lose the willingness to step outside my comfort zone. Look fear in the face. Explore with the eyes of a traveler.
Fall 2015 – let’s go.